20 Nov 21

Treasure your friends

  • Society seems to have a hierarchy for love: parental > romantic > friendship
  • However, friendship seems to be demonstrably the most important love in our lives: It is highly correlated with health and happiness.
  • Friendships are getting more important as more people choose to live without children and also detach from their parents.
  • Friendships are chosen: we have no obligation to keep them, differently from romantic of family relationships
  • Friends have shared identity, family has shared blood, lovers have shared attraction.
  • Friends are usually more similar to each other than lovers.
  • Friends are usually more open, truthful, and relaxed than lovers.
  • Romantic relationship, especially heterosexual, has a natural cognitive cost of two "different" minds trying to find harmony. With same-sex friends, the barrier to communication is lower. The perspective towards life is generally more similar.
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